When I get engaged I want to have two showers - one kitchen-themed and one all about lingerie.

I love lingerie showers. I love observing what other women - some friends, some strangers - characterize as sexy. I love the experience of seeing how some definitions are universal - perhaps prepackaged by the lingerie industry - but when you hear a room full of sincere “oooohs” there has to be some sexy standard - be it native or taught - of lacy, frilly sexy that we enjoy. We can’t all just be playing nice.

Myself, I’m only just getting into personal lingerie - in part thanks to attending so many lingerie-themed bridal showers for which I have had to buy sexy, little things for my girlfriends to share with their fiances. Until recently I didn’t even buy myself sexy lingerie. But thanks to these shower experiences I am learning it is more than okay to get a little sexy and to learn a thing or two about sexy from the women around you is what I call The Hanky Panky Lesson.

For example, this summer at a Miami Beach Bachelorette weekend the bride-to-be opened a box of Hanky Panky® panties and about three of my girls chimed in about the amazing-ness of this undergarment. Quiet, having never heard of them, I just took it all in. Not even two weeks later I found myself at Bloomingdale’s and there they were - and entire section of Hanky Panky®s.

At $18 a piece I bought three - red, black and white - and since that initial purchase that’s all I want to wear because not only are they comfortable as well as classic but mainly because they are sexy as hell. But, there is nothing sexy about an $18 price tag (the most I’ve ever spent on a single pair of underwear).

Having learned my first Hanky Panky lesson in Miami I got excited for the next lingerie shower - this past August in LA - and with every crinkling piece of pink tissue paper and ribbons unraveling their way to the rehearsal bouquet I felt I was as anticipatory as, if not more than, the bride. Oh I was beyond eager to know what was in each box!

Going on three lingerie showers and one Guess the Panty Personality game just this year I am definitely developing my girly, feminine, sexy, seductive side. And not only do I love it but I am certain my boyfriend is appreciative. Plus I really enjoy the voyeur experience of watching the bride unwrap these lingerie gifts; it’s private and personal - even amongst a group of women - because I don’t have to say a word. I can just take it all in and daydream about going shopping and playing dress up.

It is often said that the way to a man’s heart is via his stomach. Maybe that’s why kitchen-themed showers are so popular? But whether you can cook or not - and I still fall on the side of learning - the more I attend these lingerie showers the more I am starting to believe that one of the keys to a successful relationship is a drawer full of sexy, pretty things. I also think a sexy apron might do the trick as a gift for a lingerie or kitchen shower and can help stimulate a man’s heart, stomach, eyes and mind.

Keep in mind lingerie is expensive; really expensive and I set my shower gift budget at $30 a bride max.

So what do I do when I have to buy a lingerie gift? I go to Loehmanns and I whole-heartedly recommend this life-saving, well-stocked store to anyone trying to survive wedding season. Consistently I have found brand-name, high-end, quality fabric and stitching for well below suggested retail. A $50 baby-doll can cost as little as $12 and will still receive one of those group “oooohs” upon reveal. So you won’t have a Victoria’s Secret pink gift bag, but you can still make the unwrapping just as hot as the gift inside by purchasing some fun, inexpensive gift boxes or bags at your local party or drug store.

Plus at Loehmanns I found Hanky Pankys for $11 instead of $18, which admittedly is still a lot, but at least I have reduced my overall cost in my new commitment to a sexier me. And a final word to the wise: anytime you are buying clothes for someone do your best to find out their size. This can really help avoid any potential returns. But just in case - ask your cashier for a gift receipt, leave the tags on, and remove the item’s price. This is my Hanky Panky Lesson to you!

Related topics:

1. Basic Bridal Shower Etiquette 101
2. Bachelorette Party Game - Here Comes The Panty Personality
3. Bridal Shower Yoga On The Beach
4. Parting Gifts: Don’t Discount Ross
5. Planning An Unforgettable Bachelorette Party & Bridal Shower by Kristin Kendall
6. Design Affordable Flowers Like A Pro by Sarah von Pollaro
7. Survive Wedding Season’s New Favorite Bridal Shower Gift
8. Tastebooks Make Great Bridal Shower Gifts

Have a great wedding survival tip to share with the Survive Wedding Season community? Email your tips to solutions@surviveweddingseason.com.

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Tags: Bridal Shower Advice, Bridal Shower Gifts, Elle Shapiro, How To Survive Wedding Season On A Budget, Lingerie Shower Gift Ideas, Wedding Blog

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